Have you ever been in love?
July 8, 2012 § 112 Comments
Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life…You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like ‘maybe we should be just friends’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.
―Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 9: The Kindly Ones
Coco J. Ginger Says 
True. But gladly only from Time to time
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yes 😀
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The truest kind of love is always the most painful, sucks doesn’t it?
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I like Elizabeth Gilbert’s quote from Eat Pray Love about soul mates….
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I love this. But love is different from being in love, which I think is the case here. Love is beautiful. But this is also very relevant.
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yeah i totally agree
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Oh so true. Horrible when the one you ove doesn’t love you back.
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😦
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beyond pain
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oh love is a many splendid crazy thing
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Hi there!
O my, I also hate love… just got shattered…yesterday?
Please see my post…
This might explain the WHY a bit…
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Hi, I dont know if this would help… but I just want to share this…I was so devastated that I have to console myself, thus writing these blogs…
It helped me a bit.
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so pretty
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thank you very much… 🙂
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But it’s this same kind of pain that makes you human.
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exactly. yep we need it.
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I love Neil Gaiman!
By a strange coincidence I was about to sit down and put together a blog post about the last time I was truly hurt by love.
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Hi, I dont know if this would help… but I just want to share this… I just got hurt… yesterday…I was so devastated that I have to console myself, thus writing these blogs…
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I love him too. DO IT, and post the link here.
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It’s thanks to Gaiman that I discovered Terry Pratchett. Did you see the Doctor Who episode he wrote, The Doctor’s Wife? That was easily the best one of the last series!
The link is here – http://rosewinelover.com/2012/07/08/the-darkest-night/#more-665 – and I’d love to know what you think. 🙂
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As always! 😦
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hey you should be more positive being a Daydreamer 😀 😉
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But I love LOVE 🙂
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I love LOVE too. A LOT. 😀
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No pain, no gain. Third time’s the charm.
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haha I like that John. And quite quite true.
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Unanswered love, unanswered desire, is like a thousand knives stabbing the heart…Unfortunately I know this all too well, as I am still suffering the aftershocks of just such an ordeal, the fiery passion of desire only lessening in its intensity due to the lack of contact with this woman at the moment. She knows my feelings for her and I know she cannot and will not answer them, yet, very teasingly, she keeps accepting my expressions of love for her… My poetry, my sweet words, my sacrifices…
I would be better off if she just told me to go f*ck myself, instead of this continued playing of my mind by dangling her sweetness in front of my face, showing me what will never be mine…
Damn! I hate love too…
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DUMU, STOP THAT. Stop giving her things and poems and such. Bad bad Damu. 🙂
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Such is the poetry I write for her, as she evokes deep passions in me. I didn’t even write it in English, as that would be too easy an expression of how I feel. Therefore I chose to put it down in the speech of my ancestors, a magickal language, thousands of years old. The poem is entitled: My dearest, my darling, my desirable one.
lu-bi-gu la-bi-gu ul gur-ru-gu
ša-at me-li-si-im ru-â-ma-am la-ab-ša-at
ba-ni-à-a ši-im-ta-à-ša bi-it-ra-a-ma i-na-ša ši-it-a-ra
šar-ḫa-at i-ri-mu ra-mu-ú re-šu-uš-ša
lu-bi-gu la-bi-gu ul gur-ru-gu
za-aʾ-na-at in-bi mi-ki-a-am ù ku-uz-ba-am
ša-ap-ti-in du-uš-šu-pa-at ba-la-ṭú-um pí-i-ša
si-im-ti-iš-ša i-ḫa-an-ni-i-ma ṣi-ḫa-tum
lu-bi-gu la-bi-gu ul gur-ru-gu
na-ap-la-su-uš-ša ba-ni bu-a-ru-ú
ta-ar-ta-mi te-eš-me-e ri-tu-ú-mi ṭú-ú-bi
a-ia-um na-ar-bi-à-aš i-ša-an-na-an ma-an-nu-um
lu-bi-gu igi-za igi du-ru-na-bi ma-dug gen nin ki ag-gu
la-bi-gu ka-za gu di-di-bi ma-dug ka lal ama-na-gu
ul gur-ru-gu nundum-za ne su-ub-bi ma-dug gen nin ki ag-gu
lu-bi-gu la-bi-gu ul gur-ru-gu
In English it translates as:
My dearest, my darling, my desirable one.
She of excitement, clothed with sexual charm.
Her tones are beautiful, her eyes colorful and iridescent.
She is resplendent, loveliness is set upon her head.
My dearest, my darling, my desirable one.
She is adorned with sexual allure, attraction, and appeal,
With regard to her lips she drips honey, her mouth vivacity,
Smiles flourish upon her face.
My dearest, my darling, my desirable one.
At her glance happiness is engendered,
She loves attention, passion, and contentedness,
Who can rival her greatness? Who?
My dearest, the gazing of your eyes is pleasant to me; come my beloved sister.
My darling, the speaking of your mouth is pleasant to me, my honey-mouthed of her mother.
My desirable one, the kissing of your lips is pleasant to me; come my beloved sister.
My dearest, my darling, my desirable one….
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This is really precious and beautiful Dumu, thanks for sharing it here for all of us to see. It’s very intricate, I could never write in this fashion, it’s so different and passionate. Thanks much friend!
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Damus poem reminds me of the Song of Solomon!
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You are right it definitely does wow
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The build a life together, true love, soul mate kind of love is not painful nor agonizing. It is attraction, like, respect, wanting to do FOR each other WITHOUT thinking of yourself first. It is falling in love with all the happy giddiness can’t wait to see you, you leave me breathless feelings. It is that falling in love over and over with the same person no matter how long you have been together. that is what we all look for some of us are fortunate to have found that.
It is unfortunate that we have to go through alll the other to get there but it does make it worthwhile when you find the right one. Good luck to all of you.
Beautiful writes by the way
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YES YES YES YES YES YES AMEN AMEN AMEN AMEN. I agree with my whole heart.
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The day I decided I had enough of them (men, boys really, I was young), I met this rude guy. We argued, his disrespectful way , I really found he was something, something as a thorn in my ass.
Arguing we become closer, and so clear, we found each other in love and couldn’t agree better with that.
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awwwe that is a great love story. 😀
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Someone once told me you have to break a heart and have your heart broken to appreciate love. Beautiful post!
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i agree. yes he is a great writer.
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Arrgghh! That is so horrible! But so true! So horribly, horribly true! How can something written so wonderfully be so painfully heart wrenching and truthfully terrible to read? Oh the lines of metaphorical fiction cococt the memories of pain and the lustful visages of future painful occurences that are yet to be born and bred. Oh, I hate love, but I love the love hate, hate love, love hate, hate love game that is played!
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me too me too 😉
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I don’t agree. To love is to become a naked turtle. Sure you get hurt, but never as bad as the first time. Then, with practice of being open, giving, genuine, true, we learn that we don’t need the suit of armour, the shield, the front. And then… and then we become truly powerful with nowhere to fall, being our true real selves without fear of ego rejection or emotional hurt.
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this is great advice, thank you
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Reblogged this on Life Through My Eyes.
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Beautiful post; raw, honest, evocative…you described my feelings of love perfectly. Unfortunately. But, hopefully not eternally.
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i didn’t write this, but thank you, he is a great writer.
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I understand the concept being put forth, but love does not hurt anyone,it the way or the type of love that we involve our selves in that hurts us. We as individuals give love a bad name, we love those who dont love us, we allow our desire to grow so much for someone that we cannot forget about them, yes these may be the affects of love but love is still innocent i these matters, just my opinion…
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i think you are 100% correcto
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Reblogged this on bits of a silent soul.
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so painful and yet so exciting and addictive at the same time. beautiful post though. ❤
http://www.prettyapparel.wordpress.com
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precisely 😉
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Can’t add a single world more,fassinating expresstion.
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Shokran jazeelan Tahani 🙂
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The poet Larkin wrote that: ‘what survives of us is love’.
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oh i love that. so prettily said
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Glad you liked it. It may be a pretty conceit, but it is pretty 🙂
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Love sucks, and there is nothing good about it, or that can come of it. It is worst than everything, except, of course, not loving.
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😀 right-o!!
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wow. Nail on the head or what! You captured so much with so few words. A very universal feeling, I suspect. Outstanding!
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Thank you, I actually didn’t write this. But I love it.
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Love is not always a sharp pain a traumatic event, love can be wonderful and fulfilling and a blessing if you will allow it to bloom in your heart and soul, it can be healing and trustful and wont hurt you one bit, I found love along time ago and have tried in my stupid ways to destroy it before it destroyed me, but then i gave in to love one day,cant really put a date to it, but i just gave in and let the love that i had for my wife inside of me and it helped, here i had a person to talk to, to hold me when things were bad, to cry with and tom laugh with and share wonderful things with, i can not imagine my life with out her, she was the anchor in my life that helped me to get the help i needed, now she needs me and i have to be there for her, i am not good at this role but i am trying, you see she has COPD and right now plurase i dont know how to spell it, but it means i have to be strong for her now. love is like that it is a give and take kind of relationship, it is a 50/50 road to travel together and it is not always easy i still try to sabotage it from time to time but it always comes back down to that one look or a small kiss on the cheek, and it reminds me of all the reasons i love to be on love with my wife, and sometimes it takes a smack in the back of my head to remind me also, thats just the way love is.
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This is beautiful, thanks for sharing your story. So great to hear others adventures and experiences with love. xoxo
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Love also has it a beautiful side. Plus, I feel like we can’t run away from just because we’re scared, I mean if we did this then we’re leading nothing but a cowardly half-life.
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you are right.
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accurate
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Without the pains that “love” brings, we would never experience the thankfulness for TRUE love when (and if) it is found. As I read once, hearts are made to break and spill their contents to make room for more love. I probably didn’t get that quite right, but I hope you know what I mean 🙂
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yes i do and i couldn’t agree more
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Reblogged this on Eliza Shane and commented:
I have!
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Perhaps I should have prefaced this post by saying that I do not hate love. 🙂 I think love is brilliant, bold,honorable, intriguing and courageous. And I DO LOVE LOVE. I don’t think many people know how to really love, and I think it’s cool & amazing when you are able to let loose and fall fall FALL MADLY IN LOVE with someone– like CRAZILY INSANELY-not a rational brain cell left in your being–SORT OF LOVE, throwing your inhibitions & defenses out the window. I think this quote is clever, true, funny and relates to all of us at one point in our lives. PLUS, Neil Gaiman is just a super clever simple dude. I like the way he writes, and I feel like he reached inside my brain and stole these words from my insides. He didn’t–but he could have.
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That’s more like it. Love is great! The greatest actually!
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if it wasn’t for the ups and downs of love i wouldn’t be a writer 😉
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Why do we (self included) think that a quote is related to how the person posting the quote is feeling? I genuinely wish I knew. Sometimes I’m afraid to post a quote like that with out a disclaimer in microscopic print at the bottom explaining that this isn’t necessarily how I feel. 🙂
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🙂 i don’t mind
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Love? As long as the heart unlocks to the right person, there’s no regret in it. It works like charm but it’s got no harm. When your path meets with the right one, you wouldn’t be able to think of anything sweeter. That’s true love. I love the way you write!
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I nominated you for an award!
http://womanwhowritesstuff.wordpress.com/2012/07/08/334/
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wow thank you 🙂
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Reblogged this on OlyEats.
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I guess love has it’s good and bad points. It does seem unfair sometimes, when you love someone who doesn’t love you back and it’s like there’s nothing you can do about it. “Love takes hostages.” Indeed.
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indeed indeed
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I have always loved this quote. I was just reading it for the first time in awhile the other day…I seem to relate to it much more lately. It is interesting that you posted it here, and I happened to see…I love synchronicity :)THANKS!
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that’s so cool
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Reblogged this on color and chaos and commented:
Synchronicity~
I was just reading this quote by Neil Gaiman the other day…Thinking how different I see things now than when I read it originally. And I happened to see this post. I love this quote.
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that’s my life!
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I guess love is so much more than what these movies portray. And, maybe it is also a function of the age group that we belong to and the commensurate understanding of the world that we have.
But the answer to the question put forth in this quote, that have you ever been in love , is that- at any moment in our life, we always are in love, with someone/something or the other 🙂
Thank you so much for the post !
Will reblog 🙂
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Nothing has brought more pain and joy at the same time as my love for A:)
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love pierces defences, but makes lovers much more complete, being able to stand strong without shining armour =)
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Reblogged this on Someone Stole My Cookie… and commented:
So true.
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Maybe it’s true, but as well as pain, I think there’s also laughter and positive things about being in love.
And if you let someone break into your armor, it’s because you think that that person is trustworthy, right?
But as well you can mistake that person.
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quite true yes
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I LOVE love!!!
I have lived through the painful, the unlove, the fake love, the lie of love, and finally have stepped back into my past, met my present and glimpsed my future.
It is true, seems we go through hell to get to Love, but when you find the right one, it all makes sense. All the suffering in the world leads me to understand and appreciate the Love offered to me today.
I am going to grab that son of a gun like there is no tomorrow.
Your writing is beautiful and moving.
Thanks for creating!
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awe that makes me happy. great advice. and thank you very much 😀
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Saw Neil Gaiman recently at his wife’s backlot party in Gowanus–he seemed happy. And he had pizzas! Many many of them!!
I haven’t read The Kindly Ones in over a decade, which character was it that spoke this piece of dialogue?
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guess what i haven’t even read it. but I LOVE him as an author. Wow you were at his wife’s party? How romantic. What is he like?
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A very charming British gentleman. Yeah, it was this block party Amanda Palmer threw after her Kickstarter thing was successful, in this back studio lot.
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Coco its too late to read all the wonderful comments you have evoked. I want to applaud your writing skill – your genuineness and the interest it evokes. You touch universals and yet are very personal – this is the true way of the writer. Go well into this Good Night! Blessings John
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Good morning John!! What a very kind compliment you are very generous this makes me feel happy happy
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Yes I have been in love and now I am heartbroken! I will toss my hat, burn my books, and become a monk.
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No Vincent I won’t allow you to do that. Be happy 🙂
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‘I will be flesh and blood.
For there was never yet philosopher
That could endure the toothache patiently.’ – The Bard.
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🙂 i like that
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I both love and hate being in love at the same time.
Your post made me go ahhh, and then argh!
Great post.
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Awe yes the bittersweets of love 😉
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One good comic book quote deserves another:
“The holes in our hearts may never heal, but we would not have souls if not for love.”-Geoff Johns, Hawkman
(I don’t know the issue number off the top of my head, but art was by Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez. 19? 21?)
Kudos on the Gaiman.
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OH I LOVE THAT. So true!
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Neil Gaiman is great! I read a few from that series. I should read them all. Thanks for sharing it here.
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The man certainly has a way with words. He expressed what so many of us have felt too many times before.
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Love is hard – definitely
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Words of wisdom from Mr. Gaiman.
Nice work with the blog. I’m going to keep reading.
PS.
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Every word of what you have is true. The feelings are so true…I love the way u have expressed the same. Great!!!
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i’m glad you can relate
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Thanks. Do feel free to comment on my poems as well. By the way, where are you from?
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Hahahaaaaa Can’t believe you read “The Sandman”!
I mean I know Geiman’s all famous now (well, now being lke the last 5yrs) but thought “The Sandman” appealed to only us comic-book geeks? 😛
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Reblogged this on iminemyself21's Blog.
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