April 16, 2014 § 15 Comments
You try and explain a chance you didn’t take, but the only part in your voice that makes sense is the fear that’s shadowing over every word you speak—so you stop talking, because you can’t even stand to hear this voice that’s stemmed from your head and not your heart. You brush your teeth, you slide and dance happily slipping in your white socks across the wooden floors of your home. You smile and twirl—but there’s tears in your eyes, your hearts heavy and you feel it with every turn. You open the door, then you close it. You do it again—it’s part of your routine, your try to prove that nothings changed, that you’re okay, but there’s a heaviness that surrounds you, thats birthed from your innards, and slowly it’s destroying you. You brush your teeth but your heart aches and routines feel like the heaviest weights you have to drag around without choice.
So you whiten your teeth, you buy new shoes and a new dress. But then you drink a pot of coffee, you don’t go anywhere in your new shoes and no one even compliments you on your dress because no one can see you when you’re hidden away with your heavy heart and your regrets. And it’s then, that you realize things are temporary, beauty is vain and fears will always come and go — but when you’re given a chance, an opportunity to risk the comforts that keep you sane and boring, those won’t come every day…and when they do you have to jump, you have to say YES, you have to be ready…
So you put on your new Jimmy Choos, you pack a bag, you open the door, then you close it. You open it again, then you slam it. And you can feel it— same routine, but your heart is light and bright, and the heaviness has left, because you’re speaking from your heart and ignoring your head. So you open the door, and you take a huge step, then you slam it behind you. You leap down the stairs, and you hop on a plane.
Because your hearts light, and when your fears aren’t holding you back, you can go anywhere, you can do anything, you can be anyone. So that’s just what you’ll do, because the world needs to see your new dress. And there’s someone who needs your bright fearless smile. And then you’ll write out your own story in a prose or a children’s book or a poem, because the world needs stories of girls who were afraid, but overcame their fears in order to live OUTLOUD the most passionate life possible. Then you’ll put down your pen, and click your heels because you knew Marilyn Monroe was right when she said, “Give a girl the right kind of shoes and she can conquer the world.” And you look out the window of the airplane and you watch as the world you knew slowly fades, but you’re not afraid, because you know this is just the ending of one chapter, and the beginning of another. And love, is worth every risk in the world. And you keep writing without edits, and you keep flying without fears…because that’s just who you are when you’re living in your heart, and not your head.
Click click click. 😉